Passport Express

The word vacation can sometimes take on an indefinite amount of meanings. There’s the romantic couples trip, the heavy alcohol induced girls trip, the quiet, spiritual retreat trip, and then there’s the family vacation. I recently embarked on the latter and it was challenging, to say the least. It started out swell, with all the best intentions, just our usual family summer vacation where we all get to relax and enjoy one another with minimal wifi. Up to this point this has always been a fantastic voyage. I mean, what could go wrong, right?

Well, in this case I have no one to blame but myself. I’m not sure if I’ve just had too much on my plate lately or if it was my debt to pay for all the good travel karma I’ve had, but I made a huge mistake. I didn’t realize that my daughter’s passport had expired by five days. I know, unbelievable, right? Hard to think that such a type A personality like me could do such a thing. I secretly think my husband was thrilled once the drama was over. He’d now have something to hold over my head whenever I’d criticize him for any of his overlooked mishaps.

So, we disembarked onto what was sure to be a Caribbean delight, with no idea what was in store. As we approached the immigration desk with great anticipation for sunny skies and crystal blue waters we were stopped by a scream to the supervisor. “Ana, ven aquí!” We all perked up. This was something we had never heard in customs before. “What’s wrong”, I said beginning to panic. “Her passport is expired by five days”, she said in her best English.

“What?” I couldn’t believe this was happening! This was truly unbelievable. “There must be something we can do?”, my husband said. “Go back to U. S.”, she said, in broken English, with great force I might add. Well, this sent me into a tailspin. What was she even talking about? Didn’t she know we came all the way from California on a red eye and my kids were starving? Something had to be done!

At this point I had an out of body experience. There was a lot of talking back and forth with an interpreter, & I was trying my best to speak any and all Spanish I knew. After almost 2 hours in a small, white, non air-conditioned room she finally caved in and let us into the country! Halle-Fucking-luhja! I don’t know how, or why, but by the grace of God we were granted entry and finally on our way to a hot meal and a much needed drink in hand. With the drama behind me, I can guarantee whatever travel blunders I may make in the future, it will never be forgetting to renew my, or my families passports. Now, I need a vacation from my vacation… Where’s the Rose’?